We have just finished dinner. It was lovely to eat together, to chat, to flirt. Good wine helped us to unwind and relax. We were in a good mood, happy to be together and excited to discover what next the night unfolds.
When you are with someone for many years, moments like this are precious. You need to cultivate them, make them count. The mundane, everyday little problems and worries kill intimacy and romantic moments better then soy and plastic kill the sex drive.
I know this now, and I wish I could take better steps then.
Enough said, that night didn’t finish with a happy ending. And it was all my fault.
When we finished eating, she went to take a quick shower.
”5 minutes” she said.
My role was simple; to put on relaxing music, bring remaining wine to the lunge and light the candles, and wait.
Instead, I reached for my mobile. There was a message light blinking, and I only wanted to turn ON the plane mode. Deep into the rabbit hole I went.
I watched someone climbing the snowy peak wearing only t-shirts then funny goat chasing the rabbit, I reply to my mum, she asked if I remembered about my dad’s birthday tomorrow, then I saw that this famous comedian had the show in my town, so I went to check for the tickets, the show was sold out, but they had another band I liked next week. I went to Youtube to review their new material.
Then I realised I’ve just wanted to play some music.
Music…
Wine…
Candles…
Her…
Shit!
The shower has stopped ages ago. I haven’t even noticed. Damn.
She was already in bed, but reading, in comfy pyjamas, with a hint of disappointment on her face.
As you can imagine, I didn’t sleep well that night, and I didn’t wake up refreshed neither.
I have not only destroyed our romantic evening, but I also put my rest and recovery in jeopardy.
The research shows that staring at the bright screen just before the bed make your night rest less effective. It takes your body much longer to dive into deep, restorative part of the sleep. You might have closed your eyes, but your brain still works on the high frequency, trying to mule over all the pieces of information you loaded in.
What’s the best solution? Just turn off your phone as soon as possible, allow at least 1h before hitting the sack. And keep it out of sight, having the mobile in your vision field, even if it is turn off and screen down, has been proved to make you distracted.
Leszek
Disclaimer.
It’s just a fiction.
Even though the story is written in the first person, and you might think I am writing about myself and my private life.
It’s true, sometimes it is based loosely on actual events, but mostly it is just my imagination.
I am saying that because yesterday, after writing the story about the perfect meal, I have gotten into the trouble. I didn’t wait with the evening meal for Joanna, she had to eat on herself, and it wasn’t what she expected.
So remember, it is just the fiction; the story to help me bring my point across. Thank you for your understanding!
